The Blog
I thought it was cool to add to this page some random thoughts. It0’s just I’m not a super steady guy so don’t expect to find new contents regularly. also I’m not going oto review these texts so expect to find al ot of errors. Sometimes I probably will write in italian︎.
Think about this as a stupid diary written by a drunk child. It mau be fun, it may be embarassing. Let’s see where this goes.
Jacopo Ernesto Gasparrini
The articles so far:
OR just surf a little ︎︎
Zombusiness Men
So I saw the last Zack Snyder’s movie, Army of the dead oe watever. Shitty movie. Bautista made me miss wrestling but thats’ all. It’s just as boring as World War Z. Zombies right now represetn surely the biggest share of horror imaginary. Ghosts, possessions, aliens, witches... those are nothing compared to the influence of zombies on pop coltyre. Why????
I’ts weird ot you thing about it. Zombies are sucj a recent invention in the western culture, while ghosts, the devil and maghic are very anxient things in my culture.
The concept of the zombie must ticle some gears in our brain that are getting activated from new conditions. The idea of someone coming back to life after death is surely antique, even older than old testament or egyptian stuff. Zombie is someone that comes back from death with deadly intentions. With hunger. It would be easy to adress the popularity of the zombies to some issue with Death or the fear of itself. But since death is the second most ancient thing after birth I ‘d say it’s npt completely abiut that.
Also, It’s very intresting to see how zombies are changinf in the years. At firsto slow, stupid and weak, that were inteded to scare the viewer only because of their pale skin or the empty eyes. From the Romero’s idiot zombie to the fast and smart zombie in The Last of Us. What is driving tis change in the genre--?
As many contemprary questions , adve ture time gave us a hint. Pendleton Ward depicts zombies as livin dead burocrats, with handbags and perfect haircuts, but eith dead skin and pustules. Im not talkinga bout episode one, wirh zombie candies ︎, but well be talking about that too.
Zombies are catchy becuase of the idea that everyone atound us can be an enemy. Its the only horrpr subgenre htat implies a complete turn in society. Most of the zombies movues have a little handful of survivors fighting for their lives in the middle of a pandemic. Sounds familiar? During thw Covid 19 world crisis everybody may kill you with a sneeze. The thing is, zombies are older than coronavirus. So where is it coming? The answe is csapitalism︎. The idea that our neighbours, our work colleagues, our relaivs may harm us anytime, and will harm us if they need to, turns the idea of collaborative society in a mexican stall. The guy with whom you’ve been chatting with during breaks at work now might tyrn against you, talking shit about you with the boss. Your girldriend now is an ex and spends her tyime actively trying to ruin your life- Your neighhbour isn’t an ally anymore, the fact thatyou’re paying taxes together in order to defend yourselves from weather and burglars becomes secondary- Npow you just fight each other over noise.
The concept of zombie is born from our perception of being the only living person, while everyoine else is dead, empty bodies around us that we fear and can’t uderstand.
Also, the fact that evil can hide inside outr societu may also come forom terrrosist culture. It’s been only 10 years from the wave of terrorist attacks in western cities. The idea of spare, invisible people organizing in order to fight and randmly kill isnt that far from the cliché starting scene from any zombie movie... he girl apparently drunk wandering in the crowded city and suddenly attacking people atroun d. That’s not different from some guy bringing a knife and starting to stab people and police agents before getting shot in Paris right? Right... Zombies are nothing more and nothing less than Gilet Jaunes movement, young arabs getting radicalized in suburbs or also Qanon shitheads pretending to fight some racial war.
Int he first episode of adve trure time Princess Bubblegum︎︎︎ finds a formula which could bring back dead candies to life. Obviously the thing goes wrong and they become zombies. Wha0ts worse is that the living candies can’t get scaried or they would explode, so finn contrives a way to make the living candies fight against zombie candies without exploding: he just covers their eyes and pretend that zombies are piñatas. The living candies kill the zombies and eat their candy entrails without suspecting a thing.
Now. let’s make a little parallelism. Let’s pretend that we are candies, living a pink and sweet life, in which is forbidden to talk about our problems. We pretend to live a problem free life, full of goals, we basically live a kitsch life. Even bad things are labeled in a bad-but-still-ok aesthetics. There might be some people, anyway, that decide to stop accepting rhis social pact, and fight back. For any reason, for the black people rights or for Quran’s sake, for Pizzagate or for mental health issues. Us, living candies must not empathize with tem. We cover our eyes and once we killed the protest we eat its spoils, as a tamed beast.
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The world is getting more and more consfusing, people feel bad, feel lost and can’t even tel why. We have netflix and fast fashion but it’s not enough, it has never been enough. Wha’ts missing is an ideal, so,ething that can unite the lowest layer of society that isn’t just anger. Ther’es no left in politics anymore, what’s left is just a profound feel of loneliness. Zombies must be the manifestation of a reaction to this. Zombies lose conscience of themselves, their only function becomes convert the livings to their state of being. Donesn0s matter what happens, how much time passes, if there’s no food at all etc. they won’t kill each other.
So maybe zombies are the answer for our need of a new union in society, after the disappearance of the left party. Maybe zombies are the good guys.
3.6.2021
Jacopo Ernesto Gasparrini
Int he first episode of adve trure time Princess Bubblegum︎︎︎ finds a formula which could bring back dead candies to life. Obviously the thing goes wrong and they become zombies. Wha0ts worse is that the living candies can’t get scaried or they would explode, so finn contrives a way to make the living candies fight against zombie candies without exploding: he just covers their eyes and pretend that zombies are piñatas. The living candies kill the zombies and eat their candy entrails without suspecting a thing.
Now. let’s make a little parallelism. Let’s pretend that we are candies, living a pink and sweet life, in which is forbidden to talk about our problems. We pretend to live a problem free life, full of goals, we basically live a kitsch life. Even bad things are labeled in a bad-but-still-ok aesthetics. There might be some people, anyway, that decide to stop accepting rhis social pact, and fight back. For any reason, for the black people rights or for Quran’s sake, for Pizzagate or for mental health issues. Us, living candies must not empathize with tem. We cover our eyes and once we killed the protest we eat its spoils, as a tamed beast.
The world is getting more and more consfusing, people feel bad, feel lost and can’t even tel why. We have netflix and fast fashion but it’s not enough, it has never been enough. Wha’ts missing is an ideal, so,ething that can unite the lowest layer of society that isn’t just anger. Ther’es no left in politics anymore, what’s left is just a profound feel of loneliness. Zombies must be the manifestation of a reaction to this. Zombies lose conscience of themselves, their only function becomes convert the livings to their state of being. Donesn0s matter what happens, how much time passes, if there’s no food at all etc. they won’t kill each other.
Zombies are a truly supportive society.
So maybe zombies are the answer for our need of a new union in society, after the disappearance of the left party. Maybe zombies are the good guys.
3.6.2021
Jacopo Ernesto Gasparrini
Mexican Astral Connection
I usually think of myself as a depply rational guy. Like... I dom’t believe in a God nor astorlogy nor the existence of a soul and I always feel so fucking embarassed when somebody shows any kind of belief. I’m starting to try to show more respect for other people’s beliefs but I can’t help to be so fucking skeptical about these things.
BTW there’s one thing that happened in my life that really tickles my mental penis.
It’s my weirdest story and I use it at parties. It’s the final plot twist.
It started like this:
Once upon a Time....
It was probably 10 years or so... Everybody was new on Facebook and it was a really quiet place. Viral conspiracy theories didn’t exist yet and one used to have like 60 or 80 friends and most of them were peiple you knew offline. Suddenly, a Mexican girl added me. We will call her ︎. She was a real person. Pretty, smart and creative. We talked a lot. We also started videocalling andf we litterally fell in love. We made also cam sex a lot of tiems (way before Covid, I would sauy we were pioneers). We promised each other we woild have met somehow. I told hert I would have gone to Mexico nad she told me the same. Obviously, thix never happend. But I actually really tried!! ︎became an illustrator and she got engaged with an europeam guy (really-??). We never lost contact. 
Omce upon Three Years Ago...
That was the first day of Fine Arts Academy in Milan. You know that shit. You want to become a young emerging italian artist etc etc...You know nobody. You start talking with a couple of werid guys and after a couple of days you will never talk to them anymor.e There was Cataldo, this young 76 years old sicilian boomer, a couple of gurls from Marche and maybe one or two tuscan guys. After the lesson they told me: “hey yeaj we’re going to the cafe reach us and grab a covfefe with us”. I reached them at the Brera Bar. I hate that place. All the tables were full, but I could recognixe the guys and I sat eith tem. I asked for a voffee. They were talkin about stupid thinfs. Yet there was this guy, he wasn’t in class. We will call hium ︎. He was really nice and elegant. Quiet. Sometimes he used to listen to us chattinf and sometimes started to read a book. I thpught “oh, he must be a shy one”. I strarted talking to him. I’m good at these things. We really enjoyed talking and turns out he didn’t know the guys. He was just sitting alone and since there was no room the academy guys asked him to invade his personal spaces. He was enthusiastic, he was reading a Munari book and I stufied Design so we reallu had somthing to talk about. He took his Nokia 3310 and asked me my number. He said “I’M ORGANIZING A CINEFORUM WITH MY FRENCH HOUSEMATE please joun us.” Sure thing mate. I gave him my number and I met a lot of people that it’s still really precious for my life right now. ︎ is one of my best friends.
Once upon 2020 the fucking Coronavirus happened...
_Yeah you already know the story, right?Well it was probably mid March. Covid hadn’t spread around yet, it was only a China and Italy problem back then. I was living with my girflriend but we went in a very bad fight right before the big lockdown happend so she was at hr parents in Veneto. I was alone. Maybe somehow I was happy since the thing with her was not going well at all. Anywau I noticed that ︎, was travelling in Europe and put some stories on instagram. I didn’t texted her, but she did.
︎ was nice as always and she was sad and scared of the pandemic. Suddenly she sent me a screenshot of an instagram direct message. “Hey do you know this guy?” she asked. “He sent me this message but I don’t kow him...”.
Ita was a WEIRD message. I mean. Very very sweet. like SUPER sweet. But it was in Italian, there were no other messages in the chat and most importantly... it was from ︎.
I was so confused. I noticed at. acertain point that ︎ was following ︎ on instagram, but since ︎ was working, among other thing,s in the arts and ︎ was an illustrator I thought it wasnt that weird. I remembr I thought “Oh well... such a small world!”. hehe.
I told her “fuck! yes! I know him! It’s ︎! That’s WEIRD!” The message was somethig like this:
“My dear, in all these years yo’ve always been in my brightest thoughts. I saw you’re in Europe. Come in Milan, we may marry again.”
With immense love
Yours ︎
With immense love
Yours ︎
First reaction: SHOCK
︎ swore she didn’t know ︎ even after showing her some photos of him. I was so intrigued. ︎ and I used to videocall a lot these days so I started askingcasual questions.
“You know... after this mess I’d lioke to travel to some cool places...”
“Oh cool! Where would you go?”
“Oh well.... I was thinking about Mexico...”
“Damn man great place, I went there a couple of years ago with a friend”
Holy fuck.
“Yeah... I saw this cool place with a crazy carnival parade... San Cristobal de las something..”
“San Cristobal de las Casas... that place is dope. I should have spent there 3 days but I spent a week.”
Holy fucking molly.
I was on fire. ︎ was so scared. She had a crazy phase of this life and she was scared she fucked him while on drugs.
Slowly, she started to remember.
They met in Mexico one night. ︎ shouldn’t have gone out and she was in pijama. ︎ was out with his friend going around doing crazy alcoholic italian things. They met in this bar, he started talking to her and bought her a beer. he peeled off the beer etiquette and made a ring︎with wich he married her. They spent the night together aaaand thats it. I mean, yeah
I told him. we wnt crazy. How could it be???
The’res a stupid theory abot all the people int he world knowing each other for no more than 7 passage.s
Bullshit obviously,
but the shits real
wow.
I mean
WOW
I’ll giv e the reader some more whit space to think about it.
wow
13.04.2021
Jacopo Ernesto Gasparrini
ClubHouse
I’ve been playing a little bit with this new app, clubhouse. Not yet sure I like it. I had a couple of weird experiences so long. I was randomly surfing between rooms and I started with the italian ones. I found a couple of famous characters talking and joking letting people speak for some seconds. But they were so bully. people don’t necessarily have crazy stories or good public speaking skills so it was weird to see fampus people making fun of us loser.
bullyyy
Afrter a while, I encountered asmall room with italians only. I silently listened for a while, they were fun. I also laughed loudly a couple of times. I presented myself and itwas alrtight. Not big topics, tho,. at some point a guy quoted a famouds cinepanettone , saying “So de Latina.”. It’s a joke I oftem tell with my friends. And the next quote is: “Se è robba de froci io nce sto”. I said it loud. They went crazy. I got quickly kicked out of the room and I spent the next 7 minutes with my eyes wide open and adrenaline blowing up. I felt so stupfid but it’s fine. There probably were some homosexual people in the room and before kicking me out tghey said oh no another trooll. I’ts fine, I felt angry because they didn’t get the joke and there were obviously no homofobic meaning in it. But this tells me there will be new ways to make feel people like shit.
Also: how this app makes money? Will they introduce Ads during streamings? like a spotify thing, wirtth the chance of makingh some kind of supscruption or something. Or maybe they will put animated ads in the home. I also thoufght they may be using audios to train artificial intellingence,
13.02.2021
Jacopo Ernesto Gasparrini
Porncoins
I’ve been playing with a stupid web game lately. This reminds me when I was young and I used to secretly go on flashgames.it and play with porn games on the family PC(back when rhere where just one computer per hoyse). The game is similar to candy crush so it’s super addictive.
Also the game is pornb. Like when you reach a certain score, a sexy cartoon girl undresses herself and fucks the main character. I love porn comics so this game really fits perfectly my taste. Unfortunately recently the game has broken. The spawning of the toys is stuck and refreshes only when you quit safari and reopen it. A weird thing is that this stupid game also slows ALOT my mac and it’s weird since it’s so simple. A friend of mine who is into cryptocurrency thinks this game is a trojan horse to make my computer mine bitcoins. I guess it’s fine as long you give me free quality porn.-But now I can’t get any free porn at all ︎︎︎︎︎
11.01.2021
Jacopo Ernesto Gasparrini
001a
